Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Hi.
For whatever reason, I decided to go through this and read it. Ha. Ha. Ha. I love when my life takes drastic changes and I hate the fact that there's still the same stupid ass shit I carry with me.
The funny thing is how many different secrets are encoded into this blogspot thingy, it's amusing but also really frightening. The weird thing these days is that I have no more secrets to keep. As the lady said in Titanic, "A woman's heart is a deep ocean full of secrets" or whatever the fuck the quote was. Aka yeah I don't tell my parents the things I do. But there's no reason to keep secrets anymore. I don't think that's part of growing up because I know far too many grown ass men and women who have kept some horrible secrets.
But, whatever.
Still truckin', still working, and Imma just keep swimming.
I've felt so loved the last few days-- which is odd cause you know me, I'm convinced the world's against me and everyone despises me for some reason or another. I'm just gonna keep living this dream until I wake up... Which will probably happen in a few weeks... Like when I get my dentist bill and have to pay it... Or when classes start and I start panicking because that's what I'm really good at doing.
It may just be my delusional personality but I have a feeling that no matter what, everything is going to be okay and it'll all work itself out... But not by itself. I need to coax it in that direction and keep pushing it so it doesn't completely ruin me. Little by little it's all being fixed, cleaned, polished and pieced back together. Let's see if I can keep it up. I'm not that stupid, am I ?
The funny thing is how many different secrets are encoded into this blogspot thingy, it's amusing but also really frightening. The weird thing these days is that I have no more secrets to keep. As the lady said in Titanic, "A woman's heart is a deep ocean full of secrets" or whatever the fuck the quote was. Aka yeah I don't tell my parents the things I do. But there's no reason to keep secrets anymore. I don't think that's part of growing up because I know far too many grown ass men and women who have kept some horrible secrets.
But, whatever.
Still truckin', still working, and Imma just keep swimming.
I've felt so loved the last few days-- which is odd cause you know me, I'm convinced the world's against me and everyone despises me for some reason or another. I'm just gonna keep living this dream until I wake up... Which will probably happen in a few weeks... Like when I get my dentist bill and have to pay it... Or when classes start and I start panicking because that's what I'm really good at doing.
It may just be my delusional personality but I have a feeling that no matter what, everything is going to be okay and it'll all work itself out... But not by itself. I need to coax it in that direction and keep pushing it so it doesn't completely ruin me. Little by little it's all being fixed, cleaned, polished and pieced back together. Let's see if I can keep it up. I'm not that stupid, am I ?
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